sunday thought.

My church starts at 9 am and today I woke up late.  I made the decision to just not beat myself up about it and to go back to sleep.  I have been working way too hard (justifying myself).  But really, my schedule is draining me.  But it's good.  I have been enjoying my life like this (minus the lack of sleep.) anyway, when I woke up at 8:45 this morning I looked at my roomate and said, "shelb, I had a dream that you asked me if we should get up and go to church or if we should just sleep today." (true story) and she replied by saying, "ha thats a good question." 

so we shut our eyes and went back to sleep.

this doesn't happen often mom, I promise.

so 12:45 rolled around and I was feeling so good from the sleep that I had just got.  But I was also feeling like I had missed out on my sunday and that little ounce of peace that I get to feel when I am sitting in sacrament with little distractions.  So Shelb and I got dressed quickly and we were off to go find ourselves a sacrament to sit in on.  

And we happened to pick the right one.  Sitting in there was this handsome guy, he had two seats next to him and we quietly asked him if they were taken.  He politely said "no go for it." he was so cute. he wrote me a note & we exchanged numbers and I think it'd be safe to say that I met my husband today.

.I am totally joking.

this is how that paragraph was supposed to go before I let my imagination run wild.  We did pick the right sacrament to go into.  The speakers were perfect, the words were just what I needed to hear today.  At the end of the program, the stake president got up to say a few words and started by asking this question..

Do you trust the Lord? 

And then allowed for a few moments of silence.  And it really got me thinking.  As I reflect on the past year or so, I see the stubborn side of me more than I ever have in my life.  The side of me that thinks that I know myself better than anyone does and that I know what is best for me.  This is hard for me.  I feel like sometimes it is hard to just completely trust in our father in heaven, to completely give your life to him and let him guide you.  I am so grateful for my knowledge that I do have a father in heaven that knows me, that knows exactly what I am going through at all times.  As I look back on my life I see one thing that is so consistant, and that one thing is my father in heaven's unconditional love for me.  He truly knows me, and he has a plan for me.  Why I would ever question that and ever doubt that... i'm not sure.  There are always going to be a few things in this life that I don't understand, that I wonder why that happened or why we have to go through certain things that we do. But I am going to go forward with faith, putting all my trust in my heavenly father and allowing him to lead me so that that path that I take will lead me back to him.

because that's really all I want.

well that and a piece of chocolate chip pumpkin bread.

life is good